BREAKIN NEWS:

hoodride takes stresss out on spinner lookalike.

early this moring hoodride was so stresed that mqcuiston dared to give him a spinner lookalike, and to his surprise a few minutes after hoodride had de-stresed, a miracle happened!! and hoodride hit his first half century after a dismale display of games earlier this morning! some people are now saying that this spinner lookalike is jesus's son and can perform all sorts of miricales.

so if anybody wants his miracle it will be on ebay gl and good night!!!

Is this the lookalike?

BREAKING NEWS: New Spinner lookalike spotted

New one found the police are baffled:

you know, if he had a shave he wouldn't be that bad looking....

and boys i hope you know there is a piccy of spinner on pool

LUNATIC RUNS RAMPAGE IN MEMBERS BAR

Earlier this morning, shock and distress spread throughout the members bar just after a respected member ran rampage after having his beer stolen.

The user who shall not be named for legal reasons ran at a crowd of regular snooker players and used unimaginable violence against them as a suspected user stole his beer.

One witness was at the scene: "I couldn't believe what happened! Firstly i heard some kind of jibberish cursing then turned around to find him frantically looking for something. Suddenly he started foaming at the mouth and ran towards the crowd of people at the center of the room. Shocking stuff!"

Another frustrated user claimed: "i was peacefuly playing a game of snooker when this lunatic ran at me and gave me a left hook. Next thing i knew, i was flying out the window bleeding to death. How dare he! All that rank i lost!"

5 users were treated in hospital for severe injuries and 8 for miner. Including one who was treated after being headbutted several times even after he fell to the ground. One even got attacked with a table leg.

Reports suggest that it took 5 moderators to restrain him and was described as a 'hulk' type person with "the ability to endure any sort of pain".

He was later taken into custody where he admited to his crimes. Another suspect who actually stole his beer was also charged for attempting to provoke a mass riot.


The source of the crime.

Edited at 23:00 Sat 24/02/07 (GMT)

FUNKYSNOOKER MEMBER HEALTH WARNING

Following the arrival of certain funkypool members to our forums, i urge every snooker member to take out some sort of health cover and make sure any last will and testaments are registered with their solicitors.

The dramtic increase in general chat posts has already caused our funkyserver to fall over this morning, and 2 moderators have been seen peering out of a black hole to see if the coast is clear.

One member was quoted saying "Im going for sure now" and left in tears as his snooker world started falling apart around him.

HAHAHA


I hope u dont mean me there Driver???

Edited at 15:09 Mon 26/02/07 (GMT)

OMG they have arrived...go back to pool!!!

*ahem?* what is that supposed to mean Flukey???

Well snooker is a well manered gentlemans game...and pool is the sorta game you play in a bar with drunken blokes

Can you keep this to the general chat thread? Your going off topic.

oops

Edited at 17:59 Mon 26/02/07 (GMT)

anyway back to funkysnooker news!

FUNKYSNOOKER INVADED BY GIRLS!

Funkysnooker has been a all boys site until now! Girls from funkypool.com have been sighted on the forums! Hopefully the forums will benfit from the new arrival of women to help keeping the males under control!

FUNKY POLE DANCING THE LATEST CRAZE

Following the invasion of the females of the species to our fine website, a number of poles have found themselves being erected all over the members bar and snooker club.

Its thought it has been triggered by a mass of excitement emulating from the male community. Early reports suggest testosterone levels are going to increase by 25% over the next 3 months as the competition for attention hots up.

The females are reminded not to make any sudden movements as this may cause the alpha males to attack the lesser members of the groups - moderating is hard enough without having to seperate the packs.

For funkynews, this has been driver attenborough

gavinbrash rank rises!!!

Funkysnooker user gavinbrash recorded a 3-0 win over phillipj66 today to earn 28 more rank points. The 28 point boost in Arcade Snooker has earned gavinbrash 46th place on the overall rankings.

When reached for comment, gavinbrash said to Funkysnooker Daily News reporter farren, "I am pleased to have risen to 46th with an overall rank of 845.0. This has been a long time coming and _spursjay_.... im going to take your place at the top!!"

When _spursjay_ was reached for comment, he simply dismissed the claims from gavinbrash and added "gavinbrash is nothing compared to me. I have noticed that these achievements are in the arcade version of the game. When you get in the top 10 in Original Snooker.... we will have a little chat to see who is the best!"

Based upon these comments, gavinbrash has now turned his attention to Original Snooker. Time can only tell now.

*sorry dis is a report guys... i know you like to have a laugh*



Edited at 21:02 Thu 1/03/07 (GMT)

that makes no sence u cant get in the top 50 being a 800

hahaha driver i absolutely love that news article up there haha. lol and no boys, the tournaments are not accompanied by private dances!! ...sorry to get your hopes up!! and luckily farren has provided napkins to wipe up any drool caused by looking at stephy...

WHAT? what do you mean? lol